A few years ago I was diagnosed with a terminal illness. Although I took the diagnosis seriously, I believed that my spiritual practice, strict adherence to the Law of Attraction, and open-minded belief in alternative healing modalities could undo whatever damage had been done. For a while it seemed that I was succeeding, but recently I was given less than a year to live and I knew it to be true. Ironically, that same day my friends and I had been discussing our willingness to help usher in a new vision for earth and humanity, as well as where we would celebrate winter solstice 2012. Now my investigations and curiosities are of a different nature, and I am hoping that my questions and your answers will be of assistance to others as well as myself.

Why was I not able to cure myself of this illness in spite of my earnest attempts to do so? Why couldn't the qualified healers and professionals I trusted to do so either?

This article is about who and what we are beyond our human selves. It is about transitions and what awaits us beyond this life. The questioner is not Pepper Lewis, but we are grateful for the opportunity to reprint such a rich expression of life and death.

Strangely enough, you did cure yourself by making the decision that you have made, but it does not sound like a cure, does it? A cure is a solution to a problem. Your soul considered this outcome a well-explored and worthy solution. Best said, your presence can be more vitally expressed elsewhere and there is greater support for you to be there than here. Something greater than this moment has placed this challenge before you and you have answered the challenge by your choice. You did not lose a battle and your body is not at war with itself or with you. The healers and other professionals you entrusted have become temporary companions on your journey. This has been an important experience for them and for you. Your awareness and your body (elemental quality) have also learned, adjusted and expanded into new environments. Expansion of self is always a worthwhile endeavor.

If and when you explore this subject in another life it will more than likely have a different outcome because of what you have learned in this life. In the future, human bodies will be better able to self-diagnose and self-heal. Today, health and wellness are referenced by an outer reality and by symptoms. There are better ways to self-regulate a body and humanity will discover and implement these as it is guided to do so. It must first come to trust its intuitive and instinctive relationship with self and with the inner qualities of life. This more dimensional perspective will ensure a higher quality of life. You have assisted the future of your intuitive body immensely by partnering with it throughout this experience.

Q: Once a diagnosis such as mine has been received and accepted, is life still purposeful? Are there still important things to say and do or am I just counting down days at this point?

A diagnosis does not change how purposeful or interesting a life is, but it can change how you perceive it. At this point the only thing that has actually changed relates to your reference point. You can now view your life from the perspective of having several months (more than your doctor has prescribed by the way) instead of several years. Perhaps you will not think it unfair of me to suggest that many months and even years in a human life can be empty if not filled with meaningful experiences, so how much life one actually fills one's life with is very relative.

Many believe that if they were to receive a diagnosis such as yours they would immediately begin to do all of the things that they thought they had been missing out on - un-lived adventures, courageous acts, exotic travel, etc., but that is rarely the case. More often, one reflects upon the smaller moments and becomes strangely attached to them - promises not kept, communications and miscommunications. Rather than relating to your days as the last ones I would suggest you relate to them as the first ones from within a new context. The human being is somewhat extraordinary in its ability to combine creative thinking with divinely inspired action. If you are alive and breathing then it is not too late to be doing so. There is obvious purpose in this; otherwise you would not be doing so. It would be a pity to simply count down the days when you have so many other options to consider.

Q: Can you describe the experience of death or crossing over? Where exactly do we go when we cross over?

From a human perspective it will feel a little like slipping into a pool of water or a warm bath. There is a moment in which you surrender one environment in favor of the next. When you step into a hot tub for instance, you are dry and out of the water and then you are wet and in the water. As the new environment becomes more comfortable than the old, the choice to enter or linger on the threshold is entirely your own. You will awaken as if from a sleep, and there is no hurry to do so.

You do not actually go anywhere, except that you are no longer here. The experience is one of finding yourself in a more expanded version of 'here' than you were previously able to experience. You will notice with a bit of humor (and perhaps frustration) that it was here all along but you did not perceive it. You will still feel as if you belong to your life and to all that was familiar to you, but somehow any sense of urgency will have dissipated. Other aspects of here/there will begin to interest you and you will want to explore them. When you were very young your life was dependent upon that of your family. Later on, your friends or your career helped to shape and determine the directions you explored. The adjustments you made were natural and timely. This will be the same.

Q: What will it look like on the other side?

In the beginning will look strangely familiar, like someplace you remember from a long time ago. It will not seem physical or non-physical, just a little lighter in density, buoyant like your body might feel in a pool of water. Your environment will depend upon your awareness as you enter your new reality. The calmer you are, the more diverse your reality. You will not feel temperature in the way that you do now, because for the most part, that is your body's response, not your own. You will feel more like yourself, although this may be difficult to understand from your current perspective. You will 'see' things differently because your new awareness will allow you to perceive a 360-degree view rather than what is simply in front of you. You may have a slight feeling of vertigo at first as you become accustomed to your new environment. This will pass. It will seem that there is a floor beneath you and a ceiling above you. While this is true, it is made of a finer substance than what is available on 3D earth. In the beginning your experience will be as artificial as your experience on earth has been, but it will seem very real. Your point of arrival is a temporary place, much like a mother's womb is also temporary. When it has served its purpose it will begin to dissolve and another more appropriate place will appear. Since you are already aware of what is coming you will not be as surprised as others who perhaps in a state of shock find themselves suddenly out of their body and without the means to get back into it.

Q: What will I be, do or feel on the other side?

You will feel more like yourself than you do now. You will still feel very much like your individual self, but you will also feel comfortably connected to others. You will feel more a part of the web of life than you do now. You will not feel as separate or alone as you do now at times. Gradually, you will remember more about yourself, experiences you have had and lifetimes you have lived. This will not happen overnight, but since you will not be measuring time as you do now, you will not feel rushed to recover anything or even feel like anything is missing. You will have access to memories and these will be in as much detail as you would like. You will be able to almost live certain memories again if you choose to. Although you will find this ability very interesting at first, you will find that you are more interested in the now and less attached to the past, similar to the way you feel about your childhood today.

You will still be yourself, but a more refined version, so to speak. You will have a body but it will not necessarily look like a human body. It will be more translucent, and it will seem to you that you are dressed in Light, or a light-like substance. It is difficult to describe the experience of being your self and yet being something entirely different, words are inconsistent and unsatisfactory in this regard. You will not be disappointed and you will not miss your body. You will feel more agile and less limited than you do now.

You will have many activities from which to choose, but these will not be arranged in the same 'doing' sense as your days are currently arranged. Your activities and pursuits will be purposeful and fulfilling. You will not measure your time spent by how productive you have been or by any other goal-oriented approach. As you become interested in exploring certain subjects, they will simply become more accessible to you. You will easily draw to your self what interests you most, as well as others of like interests and even teachers in that field if that is supportive to you. If you were interested in the service fields upon the earth you will be able to continue these pursuits as well.

As you become further aware of your new surroundings and abilities you will have even more choices and access to other dimensions and worlds. This may seem rather fantastic to you now but will seem commonplace and normal to you when the time is right. There will be others present to assist you in remembering or acclimating to your new surroundings.

Q: Can you say when that model will be introduced? This year? Next? You say that many will embrace it, but why would they?

The new model will be introduced when the current one is almost exhausted. It is moving in that direction very quickly. That is one of the reasons why there is such little concern for how or when the current accumulation of debt of will be repaid. It cannot and will not be repaid. Like the Queen Bee in the beehive, it lives for many seasons in service to those who have installed the queen as their monarch. The queen is protected at all costs, but in the meantime those who serve also feed off the queen a little at a time. Eventually the queen exhausts its usefulness and a replacement must be found.

The present system must first be proven obsolete. It will not be allowed to die easily or generously. It will be slain and its head (or the symbol that represents it) will be mocked. Its weaknesses have already been exposed, as have the riches of those who have lavished upon themselves its largesse. The rescue plan that is being mounted is already too late, but it must appear otherwise for the time being. Eventually, under the restorative efforts of the newly elected, the benefits of the new model will be introduced. The advantages of the new model will be obvious and will include something for almost everyone, from those in the highest echelons to those in most need of charity. The new model will do away with the accumulated debts of the old, and it will allow almost everyone the same advantage. It cannot be said with specific timing how soon it will come about, simply that it will or that it already has depending upon how it is viewed.

Q: After all of the transitions and adjustments are complete who or what will I be and what will I do? Will I know the difference between night and day or have good moods and bad?

You will still be you, as that will not have changed. It is best to think of this as a transition between how you live rather than if you will live. In your culture there is a saying that goes something to the effect of the only certainties in life are death and taxes. While that may be true in present day 3D earth, it is humorously false in realms beyond this one. It may be difficult for you to imagine this today, but when all is said and done you will be and feel more alive than you do now. You will think upon your earth life fondly and with few regrets, relatively speaking. You will marvel at how you stuffed so much light and essence into such a small and dense body. You will become radiant and resplendent again and your wellness will take on a quality that is rarely experienced upon the earth, except by those who have mastered the ability to maintain their sequential faculties [expanded everlasting qualities].

In your present day life you have wondered and hoped that your thoughts were purposeful and your activities productive, yet certainty of this has eluded you because your vision has not been as far reaching as you would have liked. The experiences that await you will not be so limited and you will have almost instantaneous knowing that who and what you are makes a difference. Your interests may not change as much as you imagine. For instance, your present day interests in the communicative arts can be expanded to include other faculties and methods of expression. Your present day interests in channeling can be explored from the other side, and with a bit of humor I might add that you will have your hands full convincing those on this side of the veil that you are quite real! Your whale watching pursuits can be an even more up close and personal experience and cultural exchanges of many kinds (and many worlds) will be even more available to you.

You will not feel the passage of time in the same way you do now although you will have the experience of moving from one activity to the next. You will be interested in the time of day until you find that it no longer affects your choices or decisions. You will be able to direct your movements and transport yourself at will. You will not walk or drive although you may have that experience if you choose it. You will be a part of a graceful movement and an exquisite exchange of frequencies. You will feel very alive!

Q: Do people really review and evaluate their lives from the other side? I know that God does not judge us, but what happens if we judge ourselves?

Judgment is a human thought form. It does not really exist on other planes, but it is understood. Judgment exists within the scale of polarity and duality. This may be difficult for you to understand from your current perspective, but you will not be able to judge yourself even if you try. Here is why: As soon as you think a thought such as, I should have been more forgiving, you will instantly become more forgiving and you will re-experience the same thought from that perspective, which will change the 'I should have' into I did, I can, or I am. Your expanded self will allow you to explore the concept of judgment, but will not allow you to dwell upon the concept, do you see? The same applies to any judgmental or self-deprecating thought. You may explore any and all life experiences for as long as you wish for the purpose of understanding them and moving beyond them. On the other side of the veil you will find that you have moved just beyond the density of duality. Later on you will find that you can move even farther away from it by directing your thoughts elsewhere. The same law applies on the earth plane but humanity does not quite believe it; as you think so you are, is a well-established and worthwhile truth. If you must buy a belief system, buy this one!

Q: Is it true that I will see former friends and family members? Will they be there to greet me? Will I recognize them? What about beloved family pets?

It is sometimes true, but it is not always the case. This is one of humanity's cliché expressions and seems to persist regardless of how much additional information is offered. Thoughts regarding being lost, alone or in unfamiliar surroundings keeps this belief alive. As long as it remains a strong belief for a substantial amount of the human population, it will remain a possibility for many. You will have access to guides and guidance. You will not be alone nor will you be frightened. If you wish to see family and friends you will do so. You will see them as you remember them even if they no longer look the same. You will recognize them and they will recognize you because you have always known them and they have always known you. There is a universal language that 'knows' what you need in the moment and is able to provide it.

If you wish to visit with your pets again you will be able to do that as well, but the experience will be a holographic one. You will touch, feel and even play with your friends. The experience will be real, but not based in the same reality, do you understand? The animal kingdom is made of its own unique fabric and has its own experiential vibration. Once you become accustomed to your new surroundings you will welcome expanded experiences with the animal kingdom, domestic and otherwise. There are many different ways to experience life and this is one of them. Experiences are the most important things you can have and also keep; they make life worth living and they will continue to be as real as you allow them to be.

Q: Will I be able to keep all of my memories about this life? Will I treasure them as I do now?

You will be able to keep everything that you wish to. No one will take anything from you. In fact, it would be impossible for them to do so. At first it may seem like you have brought many things with you. It may seem like you need money to pay for things and a place to sleep. You may feel very human-like symptoms such as hunger and fatigue. When you are tired you will be assisted in how to rest and when you feel hungry you will have the sensation of eating until you are satiated. These needs and desires will lessen and after a time you will find them unnecessary.

Most of your memories will remain, with the exception of those that were untrue. Since truth has a lighter frequency than untruth, these memories will remain closer to you. Like out of tune instruments, you will begin to move away from discordant thoughts and memories. Beliefs are made of a different substance and if you are overly attached to these you will keep them with you until such time (or lifetime) as you are willing to discard them. Guilt, judgment, anger and other human imperfections will linger for as long as you want them to. You will have the opportunity to see them for what they are.

The finer moments of your life will remain intact and they will become perfections, flawless understandings that become philosophies in themselves. Eventually these will be placed into your own library, which is made of akash, a substance that records images and memories of great value. All of your current memories about past lives are located there and you will more than likely want to orient yourself again from a newer and more expansive perspective.

Q: Is it too early to say if or when I will return to earth? Will I still care about events on earth?

You will not be as far removed from the earth, at least not in the beginning. You will be interested in the earth and in humanity's progress upon the earth, but you will not feel attached to humanity or to the earth. Even if you follow through with your present desire to become an ambassador to the earth it will not be as you imagine it now. You will become more effective in your role as your perspective broadens. Although there is only one earth, there are many different versions of the earth that can be experienced. Some versions are parallel to one another and others intersect or are juxtaposed. Remember that timelines and possibilities arc, bridge and sector through dimensions and densities. You will want to reacquaint yourself with these.

You will certainly want to return to the earth at some point, but when that will be is up to you for the most part. Most of those who believe this is their last incarnation upon the earth are in error, although it may be the last time they express themselves in their current density. When the time comes you will experience a tug and pull towards a purposeful incarnation. It will feel natural and important. The earth will be very different by then and curiosity will win over fear. Purposeful incarnations are not subject to the rewards and penalties of the wheel of birth and rebirth.

Q: Why do some people age more gracefully or healthfully than others? How do some people manage to live to be over 100, even without proper care?

A human body is primarily a vehicle for the embodiment of Spirit. Spirit is drawn to the vehicle that is most appropriate for its use, design and purpose. Some may prefer a fast sports car, or a luxurious sedan, but a jeep is better designed to travel across a desert. The most graceful are the ones who live by day and dream by night, and then awaken to do the same again and again. By rote rather than repetition their progress is assured and they are peaceful in this knowing even if they know little else. Those who age gracefully do age, but at a decidedly different pace since their heartbeat has a slightly different quality and rhythm than most.

And of course, heredity must be acknowledged as a factor. The heredity of human genetics is a mixed bag for the most part, but some genes have remained within a range that is close to the original coding. The encoding mechanisms of long, long ago ensured a much long life span than that of today. Most of the original genetic encoding has atrophied over time and become recessive. They can be coaxed forward again with consciousness, but this is a skill that must be relearned. Most of humanity cannot decide if wishes to be here or elsewhere because it does not know what Here is compared to There, so it wishes for a long and healthful life and at the same time insists that it cares little for its own life and wants to go Home. Home is where your awareness and your experience most reflect your truth.

Q: What would you prefer I do with the body I will leave behind?

When you have no further use of it, and if no religious affiliation prevents you from doing what you will, then you may have it incinerated. There is no need to preserve your remains and you will find that few family members will wish to be the inheritors of your ashes for very long, perhaps one generation, but no more. Burials at sea are unnecessary although they too have been romanticized from time to time. Cemeteries will be a thing of the past in a relatively short span of time, a few generations at the most. Although your body will be a shell and a remnant of the past soon enough, I am more interested in what you will do with it tomorrow. It is still a fine companion and able and willing to partner with you till the end. It is not as flawed as you think, and when you are done cursing its short-comings you will find it quite useful, even if for shorter spans of time. Although the example I offer you is rather absurd, how many are unwilling to discard their old sofa simply because it has served them well for so long?

Q: Why didn't it work out for me to be present for 2012 when it is an event I have been looking forward to for many years? Since I won't be here, can you tell me where I will be on winter solstice 2012?

The simplest way to answer this question is to say that within the greater schema your presence is more vital and valuable elsewhere, regardless of how it appears to you from this perspective. This life, while creative and purposeful, is but one of the many expressions that you are. More than a human being, you are a lifestream, a river of conscious awareness that is always in flux and flow. Countless drops of water make a river, but it is the river that flows and the individual drops are subject to the journey of the mighty river; that your presence is requested elsewhere is not a reflection upon the value of this life. There is a now and a greater NOW in all things. The awareness that you are will always direct you toward the greatest potential. It is the way of wisdom to do so. Although you may feel that you are on the ascendant path, the Universe knows a quicker and more conducive way for you to get there. You do have some say in the matter, and in a quiet and gentle moment perhaps you will remember having participated in the decision.

You will need to remind yourself to set a human clock for winter solstice 2012 as time and space differentials will change how you experience this and other days. Although it is a unique event of great magnitude, its impact and experience will be felt on the longer side of history rather than the short burst of interest it will enjoy upon earth. Any of the ways in which you choose to experience the day or the event will be honored. Make yourself a promise of this now and you will see that a promise is something well kept. Make other promises if you like. Do so lightly and without restriction, but with honor and commitment toward the fulfillment of your word.

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